The Truth About Adult Tonsillectomy

I'm a bit bummed right now due to a $475 medical bill I received for a surgery I had recently - my first surgery ever.  Sure, the bill could have been for the over seven grand the entire thing cost, but I don't feel like I should have to pay anything beyond a co-pay for necessary surgery. Oh well.  The fact of the matter is, I don't have $475 dollars to put towards the bill for now so I will get started with 475 easy payments of $1.00 in the meantime. Oh yeah!

As for the surgery, I had my tonsils removed because
- besides the fact they were constantly infected and thus required daily maintenance, they were choking me. While sitting at my desk one day, I suddenly had a sensation much like someone wrapping a hand around my neck and squeezing.  At first I thought it was stress.  "Oh great, the knots have moved from my back to my throat," but no such luck.  Both ENT's I saw took one look down my throat and saw the swollen tonsil.  One was scalpel happy and told me to go schedule surgery at the front desk right then and there.  The other tried antibiotics which worked temporarily, but not for long.  So it was time for those bad boys to go.

When you have your tonsils removed past a certain age, people tell you a lot of things and the only one that applies to everyone is, "It's harder on adults."  That I believe.  As for fantasies of ice cream and popsicle-induced sugar comas, well, it depends on the person.  Here's what I learned:

• Cold foods and liquids are not for everyone
  Everybody is different. Sucking on ice chips is suggested for the swelling, but as far as eating all cold foods, it really depends on the person. Anything cold actually caused me a great deal of pain (with the exception of ice chips, because they were melted and thus warm water by the time they went down). What worked best for me the first few days were warm oatmeal and macaroni and cheese. Yum
• Neither are warm foods
  See above. Warm is painful for some, cold for others
• Beware of fruit juice
  Actually, I was warned against some fruit juice - the obvious ones like orange or lemonade. Some juices were suggested as they're supposedly milder, but to be perfectly honest, all juice burned me. ALL OF IT   After a while, I just gave up and had room temperature water.  By day 7 or 8, just the sight of a bottle of fruit juice made me flinch.
• Tea feels good (no lemon, of course)
  I'm told it has something to do with tannins?
• Jell-O is great
  mostly because it doesn't get too cold (for those with cold sensitivity) and it just wiggles down your throat. It was actually quite soothing - right up there with the oatmeal and mac n cheese - too bad I'm not the biggest Jell-O Fan
• The real pain doesn't kick in until a few days after surgery
  Sure, you can tell something has happened to your throat immediately following surgery, but Day 1 is pretty much a breeze compared to what is to come, because you're so doped up on the assortment of awesome narcotics given to you at the hospital for the rest of the day. Besides the post-anesthesia nausea, I was feeling pretty good and slept like a rock.  Sure they had to wheel me to the car, but I was feeling far less pain than I would a few days later.
  
  Fast forward to somewhere around Day 5 and the rollercoaster of pain began. The pain will wake you up in the middle of the night in agony. You will wonder what happened because the pain has and will intensify.  All of the sudden, I could feel things - awful things!  Excruciating painful things! The painkiller (vicoden) the doctor prescribed was no longer lasting for the four hours it should. By Day 7, it was wearing off every hour, but because addiction scares the hell out of me, I waited at least three hours before taking more.
  
  By Day 8, I was ready to stop being a hero and call the doctor.  This couldn't be right, I thought, the pain had definitely worsened!  I would have cried had I not been terrified of the pain it would cause. After all, everything else hurt - swallowing, yawning, breathing.  I called the doctor even though I could barely speak and he said something about the pain being due to the scabs coming off. Yeah yeah yeah, I thought, just give me something else for the pain!
  
  By Day 9 or so, I was begging for someone - anyone - to shoot me, as in pretty please with sugar on top, put me out of my misery.  I made such a request to the BF in my pain-induced haze.  He looked alarmed and promised me it would get better. But what do people with intact tonsils know!
• You can speak, but barely
  and if definitely hurts - so don't do it. Just be as quiet as possible and keep a pen and pad by the bed. I also communicated a lot via text messages.
• Chewing gum helps
  I heard this, but didn't believe it for the better part of my recovery. Wish I'd tried it sooner. Chewing increases salivation which helps to keep your throat moist (a dry throat can cause bleeding and another trip to the hospital). So, as soon as you can (once the tongue swelling etc goes down), chew gum!
• Anesthesia is AWESOME
  I don't mean to sound like a junkie or anything but I see now how easily addiction can happen. The anesthesiologist and her nurse came into the room, introduced themselves, and told me what they were going to give me and how it was going to go in (down my throat). I didn't like the sounds of the whole tube down my throat thing, especially since they would be operating on my throat, and panicked when the doc said, "Don't worry. The tube is very small and you won't be awake for that part. We'll give you something to make you feel good." I thought, "Yeah right. Nobody and nothing can make me relax right now. Nothing!" Then she injected something in my IV that stung a little as it entered the vein in my hand. I rubbed at my hand and complained about the sting - even less convinced that I would relax. Next thing I knew, they were wheeling my bed to the OR and, quietly, I'm a bit concerned because I'm not knocked out yet and I'm thinking the drug hasn't had a chance to work its magic. Horror stories of patients too drugged up to scream, "I can feel that!" danced in my head.  Little did I know how fast that little injection would kick in. Let me tell you, the OR was just down the hall and I can barely remember going in. I think in all, it took me less than five minutes to pass out. They were asking me questions about where I like to vacation. I saw bright lights and vaguely felt them move me to the operating table. The last I recall was babbling about Toronto. The End
  
  Next thing you know, I wake up in the recovery room. It literally felt like I blinked and the whole thing was over. I woke up feeling high as a kite and groggy. I was wearing an oxygen mask and trying to reconcile the fact that I was talking about vacation a second ago and woke up missing my tonsils. It didn't take me long to realize I was all done. I saw other patients around me and nurses and doctors moving around and thought, "Okay, I'm ready to go home now."
  
  I probably should have warned them beforehand that I'm a fighter and one of those patients who should wake up in restraints. I didn't wake up swinging or anything, but I pulled at whatever I could reach - mainly my oxygen mask and hospital gown.  I kept pulling the oxygen mask off of my face unaware of the fact that I couldn't breathe on my own yet. I heard a beeping noise near my head and didn't realize that it was actually indicating that I was in distress.  A nurse came over and gently took the mask from me and put it back over my mouth, "ah ah, you need this to breathe."  I thought, "Yeah, okay" but I was tired and the only thing keeping me awake, in my irrational high-as-a-kite mind, was this damn thing blowing cold air in my mouth and nose. I
  didn't realize that the sleep I so desired was actually me passing out. So, I remember tugging at the mask again and nodding off thinking, "This feels goooood..."
  *BEEEEEEP*
  The same nurse came back, "Honey, you've got to Breathe!" We went through this about three or four times. I'm sure she was fit to be tied and thought I was the worst patient ever...until I began removing my gown.  I remember tugging at something else - pretty much whatever I could reach - and two men across the room in scrubs gave me odd looks as they walked through. I wondered why they were looking at me that way when the nurse appeared again, firmly removed my grip from the gown, and covered my exposed breast. "Let's put that away," she said. As soon as she walked away, I guess I did it again because she returned and again removed my hand and put the gown back in place.  This time, she just shook her head.  I have no idea why I felt the urge to strip and give the recovery room staff a show. The funny thing is, I don't even care. Do you know why? I was too high to care! Drugs are a powerful thing. Get the good stuff before and after surgery.

I think that about covers my adult tonsillectomy experience. Hope this helps you grown-ups out there with troublesome tonsils. Don't be afraid!